Wednesday morning magazine roundup

It’s been, what, a week since we’ve seen Princess Kate on a magazine cover? Thanks, People, we were wondering what happened to her—and your “Princess Diaries” tells us all about “her new role as duchess and wife…dazzling the world with her real-girl glamour.” Yep, real-world glamour. Otherwise, Anthony Weiner’s “marriage” makes the margin, placing below Jordin Sparks’ “amazing body” but above Gabrielle Giffords “courage and recovery.”

Us competes with a “Harry & Pippa!” cover revealing their “love secrets,” hinting at a secret date between the royal siblings. Its margin lives up to the “Hot vacation photos!” tease with Kim falling out of her bikini; she “sets the record straight” at OK USA (she DID NOT cheat on Kris), which fronts Teen Mom Maci, who’s “finally a bride!” But what about poor Amber? We’ll have to wait until next week for that train wreck.

Real Houswives Of New Jersey’s Teresa takes the cover of In Touch with a “shocking exclusive”—her “prison nightmare” about her husband being locked up for 10 years (“My life without Joe”). Angelina’s half-mill birthday gift makes the margin, but Anj does better on Star, grabbing the cover for her “secrets and lies”—at least according to the tell-all book she successfully stopped. And at Life & Style we learn that yes, Bachelorette Ashley is engaged—and more about Kim, Pippa and Will and Kate.

But what about Jen? Marie Claire gives us her new men, new hair and “a bold next move.” Vogue has a luscious Emma Watson (is she old enough for us to say that) and her “life after Harry Potter”—and illustrating the issue’s “must-have Fall looks.” Fergie’s “hot-bod secrets” should lure readers of Allure, while Elle states the obvious regarding Emma Stone: “She’s gorgeous, hilarious, and cool.” At In Style, Eva Longoria answers our questions about fashion, makeup and the single life, and at Self Zooey Deschanel shows us how to never be bored working out again.

For the men, GQ offers Chris Evans as “one very buff Captain America.” And speaking of movie stars, the mag rightly wonders why Republicans are freaking out when Barack Obama has become the new Reagan. Ebony features Tyrese and Taraji on two hot “bringing the heat” “collector’s edition” covers, and Maxim displays “the lips that saved the world!”—Victoria’s Secret “angel” turned Transformers “mega-babe” Rosie Huntington-Whiteley’s, that is.

To go with its “Mental Machine” mechanical brain illustration, Wired’s cover story deals with the “feedback loops” that apparently drive our brains and behavior. Recalls Time’s recent cartoon brain cover representing “the science of optimism.” And finally, Time Out New York has a “Staycations” cover with 46 “cheap and easy ways to escape without leaving town,” No. 1, according to the fab cover, diving into a Midtown swimming pool/subway stairwell.